Nauru 2012

I quit my awful job on Tuesday last week and was at a loss at what to do next. The night after, on Wednesday, I heard that the Salvation Army urgently needed volunteers to do humanitarian work on Nauru, in Micronesia. Basically the Oz govt is sending the asylum seekers there instead of Australia, to stop them from coming to Oz and hanging around in detention centres... and also to stop them making the unsafe boat trips all the way to Oz.  But really to try and make another barrier between them and getting onto Oz soil...can I say that?  Especially after the recent drownings in Indonesia, there is a safety aspect there, anyway. They're planning to refurbish the buildings from the Howard-led government, however in the mean time they're setting up tents and setting up a refugee processing station there....and they need people to help. I applied, and found out, just 24 hours later, that i'm going and I was leaving 4 days later.

So after a full on medical check (had to pee in a jar...felt very football" I'M NOT ON STEROIDS" movie-esque) It';s been a weekend of waiting, wondering, doubting and finally, I heard back from her at 6pm today. Flights are booked, I leave tomorrow.  I'd almost convinced myself that i wasn't going, but when i finally talked ot her, she said that we almost weren't. Apparently issues with accommodation...either way, flights are booked! It's a bit of a 'see a need and fill it' situation, but we're helping a bit with processing, information, orientation, recreation, stuff like that. Five and a half (not sure how that works) 12 hour shifts, so it's going to be full on, but nice to know i'll have a day off to swim a little. Plus there's apparently one restaurant, so that's nice.

It's crazy and scary and very overwhelming, yet incredibly exciting. Such an amazing opportunity, plus they pay for flights, accom, food etc and i get paid for it, as well. Incredible. I'm not expecting a holiday, in fact the opposite but i'm excited. Nothing is really planned or sorted as it's all emergency and new, but hitting the ground running is a good way to be. Think it'll be a big, hard slap in the face reality check.

FACTS
Nauru has the most obese people in the world
90% unemployment
Giant land crabs
Amazing beaches
Lots of asylum seekers and tents
Will probably be in-tents
Hot all the time
Very little flora and fauna due to mining the crap out of the island then investing it badly
One of the bad investments was "Leonardo the musical"
I'm not kidding.

I'll be there in just over 24 hours after a quick stop off in Fiji.
Boom. Excite. Have a feeling it's going to be miserable and humbling and will take a lot out of me. But such a great chance to do something worthwhile.

Watch this space.

 

Barcelona was pretty great. To be honest I didn’t know much about Gaudi, other than he made a giant mosaic lizard that Erin affectionately had pet names for. So arriving in Spain with Zac and seeing the Parc Guell on the top of the hill was pretty awesome. Basically this guy was an architect with out there ideas of what he’d design. His Sagrada Familia, the giant church was apparently hated by George Orwell; loads of people find it tacky as it doesn’t really fit in with the usual Catalan architecture. This was pretty stunning though, so much detail and work has gone into it, it reminded me a little of Dr Seuss. The Sagrada Familia itself was weird, I’m still not sure what I think about it- there were weird pillars that looked like they were covered in soccer balls, heaps of what seemed random arches and columns. There was loads of religious stuff which was fun to look at; trying to figure out what was going on in each scene was fun. We planned to go inside the SF one night when it was quieter, but lost track of time and missed it, which I regret a little. Looked stunning.

We walked down Los Ramblas laughing at all of the tourist crap, drinking Moritz beer and enjoying the many people dressed up for money. The thing at the moment (or probably for the next few years) are these stupid little whistles that sound sort of like birds. They had guys stationed about 250m apart all blowing them, then the tourist kids blowing them, was pretty ready to smash the place up by the end of the walk. We walked down to the waterfront with an icecream, checked out the old city and enjoyed the warm weather. That evening we decided to go for a picnic dinner so followed google maps to a patch of grass on the map, which turned out to be a dusty little park with sparse trees through it. Not quite the nice picnic we imagined, but we enjoyed watching the dogs run through it while on our park bench, drinking beer and eating bread, cheese and olives.

I’d bought awesome hot togs in London and was keen to go for a swim, so we headed to the beach, sat on some chairs and umbrellas with a big, ice-cold jug of sangria and relaxed. It was super hot yet barely anyone was swimming, I think they were too busy being cool and tanning. Not like Zac, who was wearing shoes and socks for some of the time. Just saying. We sat near a topless girl and I decided to go for it and go topless as well, to tick it off the list (along with riding on the back of a bicycle, which I later ticked off in Sweden). Not so exciting, bit it did make these annoying women who kept trying to massage me go away, instead of before when they would actually grab my feet until I was rude. Zac kept winding me up; I’d pretend to be asleep so they would go away, he just yelled “Catherine! Wake up! Do you want a Massage!? Which would then mean they stayed for a good 10 minutes trying”. Dick.

Turns out I’m pretty bad at applying sunblock evenly and had a burnt patch on my hip (yes, just one of them) and streaks I’d missed on one leg. WIN. I didn’t really swim, more stood in the ocean on my own. Pretty cool huh?

I decided that Zac needed to try proper tapas (before this he was eating microwaved potatoes and Chorizo which he thought was yum) so we found this awesome restaurant that I would absolutely make my hangout if it was in Sydney. It took us a while to find a proper tapas bar as it’s not really the area for Tapas, think that’s further Northwest maybe? But it was worth the wait. We had mixed cured meats, cheeses, olives, breads, potatoes, Croquettes the dessert. Such a good way to eat. We stayed in the Gracia district which turned out to be a really good location, kind of like a Newtown/Erko vibe with loads of cafes and young hip people, so we fitted in pretty well.

The next day Zac wanted to exercise AGAIN (not sure what his problem is) and he made me walk up a giant hill and I almost died. Yes, the view was good, but not worth my almost death. It was around 30degrees much of the time, very different from the London weather I’d been experiencing.

The next night we heard there was a big free concert happening at the Arc de Triomphe as a promotion for a big music festival. We’d only heard of the Black Lips so showed up to see them with thousands of other people, all in shorts and singlets, drinking beer, smoking and dancing. It was such a cool experience. We walked home, bought a kebab that tasted way better than it actually was because we were hungry and enjoyed the night commotion. The Black Lips were okay, trying pretty hard to be like an old school rock and roll band, but at one stage they threw toilet paper into the crowd, which got thrown around and it looked pretty awesome. One of those bands who pour beer on themselves and headbutt cans into the crowd. Cooool.

From there we headed to back to London where I experienced my very first Chav. It was horrifying, this awful little girl, maybe 13 years, thought that someone had pushed in front of her at the local off-licence. She starts yelling at the guy working there, being racists and saying “do you even speak English?” and “suck my fanny”, which, writing this in hindsight, sounds really funny. In reality it really wasn’t, this girl was so horribly rude and I wanted to say something but I knew I’d make it worse. I spoke to the guy afterwards when she left and he said she does this all the time and has grown up coming there. It was just so funny when Vicky Pollard did it.

I talkedf with Zac about what could be done, he said that if the guy banned the girl, she”d probably have brothers who would come and smash up the shop or threaten the owner, or that the girl herself might have a knife and use it, trying to be tough. I talked about police watching the area but he said there just aren’t enough. It made me really sad, especially that this guy coukdnt do anything until this girl turns 16 and can be tried in court.

We saw a guy on the train yell at someone else, think he was unwell, just shotyed at everyone, clearly thinking he was helping everyone out by yelling at the drive3r and anyone who walked past. The cliché was there though, he was a boganm who yelled at an Indian guy who said “no you shuttup!”. We started watching this show Misfits (which is brilliant, by the way) and it’s about a group of London kids doing community service; Zac said it isn’t that far off from what it’s like. Excet the supoerpowers bit.

Coming back early meant we were there for the jubilee- huzzah! I wanted to go into town, depite knowing it would probably be awful with the crowdsm I Figured that you don’t get many chanes to see the Queen floating down the river so we gave it as go…and as you guessed…saw nothing and went home. It was totally worth going into town though- we went for a coffee at a great little café called “The Department of Coffee and Social Affairs” (such a good name). We walked up to it and I commented to Zac that there were an awful lot of deaf people out today. We turned the corner to find a huge street party with about 200 people, all deaf. They had a DJ, (which I personally found pointless) that had a song saying “lemme hear you say yeeeah!” at which the people stood there and didn’t say anything. Pretty funny.

They were all in the café and in the street, so fascinating to be a party with very little noise and speeches done by hand motions. Zac googled it and found out that at 2pm, they had a very special surprise, which happened to be when we were there, sitting against the window, seeing everything outside. It turned out to be THE QUEEN AND KATE MIDDLETON …imitators. Kate Middleton was just a pretty girl with long dark hair, but the Queen was pretty cool. She did a speech in sign language, probably about me being awesome but I wasn’t quite sure. I did an 8 week course in sign language but couldn’t really use it because all I remembered was how to ask names and how to say orange juice. But I was awesome at that.

The next day Erin had organised a Jubilee picnic with bunting and Pimms, which was fun. We made up a game called ‘cool frisbee’ where you have to look like you didn’t even mean to catch the Frisbee, then casually take a sip of beer before throwing it casually. Super fun, I think Thomas did quite well at it, Erin and I just weren’t quite cool enough.

We had Jamie’s Italian (again, so yum) and Erin organised another little Jubliee party, totally making the most of her bunting, we had Pimms and Scotch eggs, along with cute little red, white and blue cupcakes.


Since our trip was cut short, Zac and I decided to rent a campervan and do a Scotland road trip. It was awesome just looking at a mpa and deciding where we we wanted to go. We decided to do the highlands since we had our own transport, and stopped everywhere else along the way. We stopped in Wales on the first night, primarily so I could order and Bacardi and Coke and laugh at the reference. Zac gave up on these references, he later said that going to Leeds just so I could quote the Spice World movie wasn’t a good enough reason. Heathen.

I liked Wales, actually, the people were very friendly. We went to a haunted pub and I found a pub to ask for a "Bacardi and Coke please"...Myffanwy.


...and that's all I wrote. Now it's been ages and I can't remember anything! Except that Scotland was amazing, even though we couldnt understand the accents sometimes (actually couldn't understand...there's only so many times you can ask them to repeat themselves). It was amazing and beautiful and a little like NZ. Everyone should go there. The end.

Milan+Catherine=FASHION

We arrived in Milan to lovely hot weather again, looking for some super cheap accommodation Zac had found that was supposedly near the train station. After walking for about an hour with our stuff, my fun tank was empty and I whinged a lot. The best part was when Zac told me to start looking for a one star hotel. I LOLed a bit but let Zac off because I was being a whingeburger.

We found the place eventually, It was pretty simple but good for what we needed. The lady who owned it spoke absolutely no English and kind of hovered the whole time. Whenever we got up to leave, she would run out into the hallway. Whenever we got back, she was there. Every single time. We would uncomfortably exchange a few words in Italian, and she would watch us until we left. Pretty freaking creepy. Ironically the only time we didn't see her was when we checked out and had to instead wake up some old Italian guy with photos of him and a monkey on his wall. Actually.

We went for a wander down the main street where I’m pretty sure I set a few fashion trends.

I wasn't sure what to think about Milan, All I knew was that it was about fashion, but I was surprised to find out that I loved the place. It was sort of like a cooler, cleaner version of Sydney, Paris, Melbourne and Wellington combined. Probably a terrible example, but it was great, like those places I just mentioned.

We walked down the street and heard music pumping and people crowding out of a cafe. It was called "Salt and Tobacco" and it was going off- so many people spilling onto the streets. You paid $5 and got a drink and heaps of finger food (they do that in most bars in Italy- the food is awesome good food, not just crisps). We hung out there for a while, wishing that there was stuff like this in Sydney, but stupid OSH wouldn't let you. There were a number of girls smoking thin cigarettes and apparently they were flavoured. I thought that sounded exciting and European- like Shisha in the Middle East. I bought some called "Sunshine". Didn't get through the pack, funnily enough.

We wandered on and found another great little bar called Vinile, a sort of vinyl/retro/comic book/stereo themed bar. The staff were awesome and I had an amazing beer called a "Vudu" that was served in a sort of low glass bowl. We stayed there late, eating crisps and talking. A good night.

The next day a lady tried to beg Zac for money for about 10 mins. She talked for ages about how her child needs food, and then started asking for cigarettes. For her child? Not sure. Breakfast in Italy is great; we'd each get a Custard type croissant and 2 coffees each for 3.20Euros. So good. So cheap.

FUN FACT: Zac sneezes in rubbish bins. He actually runs towards a bin when he's about to sneeze. LOL

We played ice-cream bingo a couple of times which was great fun- we couldn't understand the flavours at all because they were fancy specialty ones. So we deliberately chose ones we didn't know and saw who won. Hazelnut and specialty Grapefruit don't work. Zac got some sort of chocolate and a nutty one, gutted that he beat me.

We wandered around looking for the Duomo, which I knew I’d seen before but couldn't remember what it looked like, as my last Italy trip I saw a lot of churches, museums etc. We wandered around a square for ages, me being convinced it was an art gallery and ignoring the GIANT church in front of us...that turned out to be the Duomo. Thank goodness I didn’t ask someone where the Duomo was while we were in the square outside.

We went to some local markets, ones you imagine- absolutely crowded and busy; people calling out prices and products, people pushing, bustling, and trying to get the best deal on a knock-off t-shirt or bowl of olives. It was fun at first, then I wanted to yell at everyone because they kept shoving me.

FUN FACT: people in Italy queue really close to you. Uncomfortably close.

We walked through a big park where some kids where playing kid's Olympics and a homeless man slept. We'd walked past a coffee show earlier and saw that there were special coffees advertised.

I asked for the coffee called the Bronx. Gotta get back to my roots you know? Don't be fooled by these rocks that I got. I'm still Catherine from Torbay. YEAH BOIIIII

It was disgusting, full of cream and sugar. Plus it cost about 4 times the cost of a normal coffee and I’m pretty sure everyone there (including and especially Zac) were laughing at me trying to eat/drink it without looking stupid. Pretty sure I failed.

\

Our last day we packed up our bags and waited at a bus stop to take us to the airport. While we were waiting, an old lady came up and started speaking loudly and gesturing to us with a smile on her face. I thought she was telling us to come to her launderette, but after some time we realised she was telling us that the bus doesn't stop there and we needed to walk. She then asked us about where we lived, where we'd been...all in Italian, with us saying "bella, bella!" and "belissimo" because that's what they do on TV. Totally worked. Turns out I’m pretty much fluent in Italian.

Prague with Zac

Getting to Prague ended being a bit of a mission- the day before and after I wanted to go, A train went there directly from Annaberg, taking a couple of hours. Of course, that day I wanted to go, I needed to catch a train, bus, train then a 5 hour bus. Nice.

I came from a semi-warm Germany and arrived in super-hot weather. My walk to the hotel from the train station was a little ambitious, it didn’t' look far on the map but ended up taking about 45 mins with my bags in the boiling sun and jeans on.

Zac's flight was delayed due to the pilot about to land then deciding he couldn’t make it and quickly pulling up from the tarmac and freaking out all of the passengers. I asked Zac if he played "which character would you be on Lost?" but he didn't, which seems foolish, really, especially if you were in immediate danger like that. I'd get Locke on my side, stat. And probably tie up Hurley so he didn't eat all of my food.

Zac finally arrived, on his birthday, and I was awesome and went and bought beer, for him. Not because I wanted one, that was a coincidence, I’m sure. We went and bought shorts and jandals, sat by a bridge by the river and enjoyed the view. I was pretty impressed by Prague, actually. I hadn't read any Kafka, don't know much about architecture and the language confused the heck out of me, but it really didn't matter. The city itself was stunning, there was so much to see and do- with the rivers passing though, the different areas, the old buildings- there was one place we went to, apparently famous, where the whole inside of the place was covered in mosaic tiles. So cool.

My favourite part, however, was when we sat in a park and relaxed from walking all day. I had a sip of beer then went off the make a phone call. I get back to find that my unopened bottle of water and my beer was missing. Zac looked at me guiltily and told me he'd given it to a homeless man. He then took a sip of HIS beer. Which he didn't give to the homeless man. Dick.

We walked a lot- I got the worst blisters I’ve ever had and it meant limping around covered in plasters for the next week or so. We visited the Kafka gallery and didn't understand any of the references, (however Zac and I later bought one of his books so will be able to make clever jokes next time).

The first night we went to go and find a traditional Czech meal- Zac won, he had a pile of unknown meats and mounds of potatoes and a mystery beer.

We found a cocktail bar by our hotel called Tiki Taky which had awesome cocktails for about AU$3.5, all tiki themed. The whole place was kitted out with Hawaiian kind of stuff, the cups in Tiki mugs, old school rock and roll playing, it was fantastic. It was owned by one guy who worked every day until about 6am. We weren’t cool enough to see it, but apparently it got crazy every night around 3am.

The next day we did a bit of tourist shopping and found a great shop. Unfortunately the lady who owned it was a crazy rude lady- she followed us round, scowling and kept telling us to put things back when he picked them up. I didn't but things from her on principle. Then couldn’t find other stuff available in any other shop. Dumb. We had fun looking for good coffee. We went to a couple of places that Maike's parnets had recommended- the 5 star equivalent that served better espresso.  It was quite funny to look around and see the nicely dressed patrons, then us in shorts and jandals with backpacks. It was still cheap for us, but more than you'd pay anywhere else in the city. Little bit fancy.

Food was an epic fail, other than that first night. Because we walked so much, by the time we were ready to eat lunch, we were so hungry it didn’t matter where. Turns out that KFC's standards in Prague are quite a bit lower than in Australasia. I felt nauseous as soon as I bit into it, lost my appetite quickly as I saw the fat and nerves and other goodies we aren’t' allowed to serve in NZ. Yet we didn't learn our lesson - "Zac, let's eat healthy today, let's make better choices....all you can eat sushi? Heck yes!” Oh wait, all you can eat sushi is TERRIBLE. Okay- Schnitzel King- that sounds awesome, right? No. No it doesn't. Just because your mum's schnitzel is amazing doesn't mean that the King of schnitzel can make it better. Such a fail. On the plus side, our hotel did a free breakfast so we filled up each morning before failing at every other meal.

I drank a lot of beer there. I'm not usually big on beer, but when you've been walking all day, it's hot and Coke is way more expensive, beer definitely has an appeal. Catherine classic.

We headed to the airport en route to Milan and tried to practise our Italian. An Italian guy laughed at us. The end.

German adventure

In Dresden I met Maike at the Train station as her bus had arrived only minutes earlier, coming from Annaberg. Maike has an old friend there who she goes and stays with often. He’s one of those chilled people who leaves a password for his friends and they can come and go from his house as they please, so he was happy for us both to stay there. His name was Marcus, such a fascinating guy.  He’s a real life inventor; (actually) he built his kitchen and bathroom himself. He roasts his own coffee that his sister sends him from Ethiopia, where she lives (usually Harrarr…mmm), just a great guy to get to know.  Maike and I bought Sauerkraut and bratwurst (at my request) and we had a traditional dinner with mashed potatoes.  There was loads of Sauerkraut left over and Maike tricked me into eating it for breakfast with bread and cheese, saying it was a typical German thing to do. It wasn’t so bad, but breakfast is a bit early in the day for it, I think. We ate loads of Milka and I was got excited over Markus’ little coffee grinder and his roasting techniques with coffee.

The next day Maike and I visited the little alleyways throughout Dresden, seeing the little shops and I learned about how felt is trendy there. They have shops dedicated to things made out of coloured felt, literally selling nothing but felt stuff. I gave in a bought a bright green felt ring, which I really liked. Not so much into the bright felt arm wraps they had. Hippies.   We did a tour of the old city, where Maike kept telling me lies about everything we saw and then I’d comment on it to the guide who would tell me I was wrong while Maike laughed. Maike actually knew just as much as the guide did, so next time I’m going to make her do the tour. Though she’ll probably lie. And I’ll definitely fall for it. Dresden has some cool history though. This guy August wanted to be the King of Poland, but didn’t have much money so he borrowed heaps and was all ‘here I am!” and it worked. He has a gold plated statue of himself and is so in love with himself. I’ve found my new goal in life. Anyone want to lend me some money?

That evening, Marcus, Maike and I went to see a play. It was a group from the Baltics who spoke in English. Four boys, four girls, sitting facing each other in chairs and sharing about real life experiences they had. Some were funny, some were really sad, others just made you think. Each story was told by the individual that owned that storey, then they pointed at other actors and gave them characters, for example, then my mother (points) said “you are a bad girl!”- then that actor will say that in their language (I can’t remember where they were from).  When it rained in the story, the actors drummed their fingers on their chairs. When there was music, the actors made the music. I’ve never seen anything like it, especially as the actors were using their real stories, but I really enjoyed it. After the play, we went to visit Marcus’ best friend in an old Dresden pub. I had the best cider I’ve ever had (better than NZ, I have to say) and we chatted for hours in this little local pub. Great fun.

The next day Uwe, (Maike’s boyfriend) Maike and I drove to Welzeim, where her parents live. On the way we stopped to put air in the tyres, when I heard a band playing music. I turned and saw men in random suits playing instruments badly, waving a giant flag.  I quickly got out of the cart to see them marching into the petrol station, with the flag bearer going in, still marching, asking for free beer and cigarettes. The band stopped playing then asked us for money.  Turns out it was Father’s Day in Germany and also Ascension Day, which, in this particular area meant that all of the men go out together, get really drunk and ride around in wagons covered in branches. These guys decided that they were part of a battalion that needed to be honoured with free things.  Maike and I laughed for a long time before they came over to ask for money. We chatted for a while and they learned I was from NZ.  One of the guys ran off and came back with a certificate that stated something along the lines of “I hereby honour and support this battalion, which is part of another fancy Battalion in Germany.   I offer…… in support of this noble cause and promise to do it again next year. Usually I think you get them for giving beer or money, but for me they wrote ‘a little kiss”.  I obliged and kissed one of them on the cheek, they all cheered, then I washed my mouth. It was so weird and hilarious. I love that Father’s day isn’t even spent with their kids. Bloody Germans.

Fun Fact: the German name for the Town Mayor is Burgermeister. I laughed for a very long time when I heard this.  Which makes the townspeople….wait for it….burgers. LOL

 Fun Fact #2: Germans really do drink all of the time.  They have hand bier, literally hand beer, which means a beer that you drink on your way to wherever you’re going. You see people walking around the streets at most times of day drinking beer, which only happens if you’re a hobo or a bogan in NZ.

After each meal (usually with beer or wine) it’s usual to have Schnapps.  At one point I had a sore stomach and Maike suggested that I have schnapps to help it.  I thought she was kidding, but they have herbal liquor that they use to settle the stomach. Or just drink because it’s yum. And it really is. Gave me a newfound appreciation for schnapps, though I still steer clear of the peach kind. Ha.

Staying with Maike’s family was great, I met them in NZ and stayed with them last time I was here. They are so lovely and hospitable and they don’t mind helping me out with my poor German. They taught me how to make homemade liquor

One evening, Uwe, Maike and I went to the Forrest Festival of lights. They had a whole lot of lanterns up and some tea light candles in coloured plastic sups on the grounds.  They had a brass band playing and had set up a beer garden with candyfloss, wurst and lots of beer.  I had my first hand bier on the way and learned a German song about Lanterns. The brass band was funny, they did beach boys’ compilations as well as traditional German songs that only the children and Maike and I danced to.  I got Candyfloss bigger than my face. Yum.

Maike’s Auntie and her partner stayed that weekend with us as well, I had the best one-liner conversation with her auntie; “Sorry my German is terrible, forgive me.” “No, it’s fine, I can understand you fine!” “Ah, but that’s because you are good at understanding”. It seems silly written down but I thought it was such a good response.

That evening we went to go and see a play.  Maike’s parents were great, they’d found a play where no-one speaks, so I could do and understand it okay. The play was so weird. They had made these giant creepy masks and just acted the whole time, with few sounds effects.  Here is the storyline. I’m not kidding.

Three men are in a bar. They are all sad and dreaming about what they wanted to do with their lives, but instead they have work and families that are annoying and controlling wives who make them forget their dreams. At the end, they get into a rocket ship and fly away. The end.

 It was so funny to see people’s reactions; most of the people there were middle-aged and were laughing hysterically. We sort of laughed a little but not too much.  Maike’s family came out and said how much they loved it, how funny it was, how true it was (not the rocket ship part) while Maike ranted about how crap it was. It was so funny.  Maike’s family paid for the tickets so I didn’t want to seem ungrateful but it was really quite a weird play.  The crowd gave about 6 ovations! Uwe and Maike work in the theatre so I guess their standards were higher but perhaps it’s an age thing. Probably that we’re just too intelligent though. That’s usually the case.

The next day Maike’s friend Madeleine came to visit from France.  Madeleine and I spent a little time together in NZ a few years ago so it was good to catch up. I met her Mexican boyfriend, Hector, and they all laughed at me when I pronounced the ‘H’. We all went for a lovely bicycle ride around the countryside.  Maike was worried because last time I visited I was so unfit and couldn’t ride very well. This time I totally won and followed her doing (tiny) wheelies to prove my point.  I got like 2 feet of air that time! The weather was perfect and afterwards we had icecream, so it was an awesome day.

We went home and Maike made me griess, which is semolina pudding sort of with custard. It’s pretty much my favourite thing ever and I really hope I can find the ingredients in Oz. It’s so cheap there and I want to cry with delight every time I eat it.

After a long weekend of amazing food (tried white asparagus, was so yum….Germans call it Aspbergers... Lol) we headed back to Annaberg.  It was in Annaberg that I played the greatest game of my life.  So, imagine this. You own 3 public toilets and charge Roman people to use them.  People pay more or less depending on their social status (slave, burger, (haha) women, senators, and they each use them for different lengths of time.  There are social rules where senators won’t wee next to a slave, for example and you have to follow these.  You form queues and strategically try to get heaps of people to use your toilet quickly and pay you loads. You get chance cards where people get food poisoning, swap around in queues, give your opponents people who do number twos….it’s brilliant. I got so competitive and quickly found that Maike was just as competitive as me.  I lost and disowned all allies.  Later on, Maike suggested that we watch the Cosby Show. I laughed unmtil I relaised they were serious…Uwe owned the whole season.  I gave it a go and it’s brilliant. What a great show- so clever, plus it’ll help me form a better Bill Cosby impression.

Fun fact #3  In Germany, Pepperoni is a type of cheese. Whaaaaat?

I had such a fun time catching up with Maike again and loved thatr we still get on so well despite not seeing each other in a long time. Maike’s friend said that this was because we’re both equally mean to each other. I’ll take that.

London, Paris, Berlin.

Onward from my soggy London travels to Paris by underwater train.  Last trip I got excited because for some reason I thought that the side of the tunnels would be thick glass and we’d be able to see whales. Last trip was 4 years ago, not when I was 4, you read right.  In hindsight this seems like the stupidest idea possible for a number of reasons, but at least this time I was prepared and so not disappointed. I got on the train fine, right time, right place, right day which was good, as my travelling now seems to come with a strong sense of anxiety that I’ve got it wrong, again.  Three times, three wrong flights, too much money fixing it- you’d hope I’d learnt my lesson. I got Erin to help me book it. Haha.

Marie picked me up at the station as she lived only 10 mins away in a place called Jaures. We walked down past about 4 bars called ‘bar Lafayette’, where I made a few True Blood references until I found out it was the name of the street, not just an overly popular name for a pub. We went out for cheese, baguettes and red wine, and then returned to her place, stayed up listening to the Beatles and drinking whiskey with her friend and flatmate. I was stoked to be there and it felt like I got to experience a real Parisian way of life. Last time I was in Paris was with my best friend Erin when she lived there for a year- so we visited amazing places she’d discovered and wanted to share with me, including the Eiffel tower and the touristy stuff, plus local places she’d found. That time, I got shouted at by a stupid lady who attacked my crap French, despite me only ordering a baguette, however this time I OWNED IT.  You should have seen me, ordering coffee and basic things that don’t require any response from either side. Winner.

The next day Marie went to work and I wandered around Montmartre, enjoying the scenes and locals, loving being in a city on my own.  I sipped espressos and felt well cool.  Montmartre is well-known for streets full of people asking to draw your portrait.  I avoided them as I needed to watch my budget, but was eventually approached by a guy I haggled down (as much as you can, anyway) who agreed to draw me. As he drew, we chatted a bit, about him going to painting school, having a mentor etc, and then his friend approached, joined by a fellow painter. All three of them chatted quickly in French while looking back and forth at me and the drawing.  It was a bit awkward at first, knowing they were talking about me but then I heard them say ‘belle’ so I was like, ‘cool, they think I’m beautiful, I’m cool with that” and left them to it. Eventually the older, seemingly eccentric man looks at me and says (and I quote) “I’m sorry, how rude of us- here we are talking about you and you don’t understand. What we are saying is that you are an artist’s dream- you are so beautiful and we would love to draw you naked. Not in a funny way, but that you have a perfect body and would be so wonderful to draw with no clothes on”. Stifling a laugh, I thanked him and saw that he wasn’t being creepy, though it was a fine line.  To make the story even better; the drawing LOOKS NOTHING LIKE ME. Honestly, it’s more like Bella from Twilight, just a plain, normal looking girl; he didn’t even draw my curly hair! I reckon he has a generic girl that he draws to maybe flatter people. I just laughed and left. Such a funny experience.

Walking home with Marie, I saw a real black market. I was pretty excited but tried to play it cool around Marie, who had obviously seen this before.  These guys had lifted up the drain cover by the road and stashed it with cigarettes, which they only opened to sell.  That’s the end of the story. Guess you had to be there. Though Marie was…and she wasn’t excited.  Unfortunately their house was almost broken into (locks broken etc) so we went to the police station in the morning. Marie kept apologising but I enjoyed the local experience. Maybe I’m a nerd. We wandered for hours, eating awesome strawberries and spending loads of time at an amazing coffee shop set up by Aussies…I think. Amazing coffee and I got an awesome coffee print designed by one of their baristas. We visited Pompidou, an awesome looking art gallery (you should wiki it) and had a coffee, before heading home to a rocking party.

That evening Marie had organised a “Catherine is the greatest” party, or something along those lines, that was it, though, I’m sure. She invited friends from heaps of different places who were all so interesting and different from the rest, trying to speak English with me as I said “oui, cava’ as much as it sort of related to conversations. We drank red wine, ate more cheese and everyone chain-smoked. I tried one of those really thin and long French cigarettes, but it’s just a cigarette that’s long and thin. Who would have thought? We listened to music, talked, danced, sang until the early hours of the morning, it was such a fantastic night. The Parisians know how to party.

Marie cooked me a special French meal that I didn’t recognise the name of.  She bought the ingredients that she said were duck but she didn’t know what part of the animal they were from.  They were sort of marinated and stewed in oil and herbs and we round and dark red. I asked her if they were testicles; she said no. I googled them and found out they were gizzards. I did try them, they weren’t bad to taste but the texture was really odd, kind of like a slimy stewed beef- though that description also doesn’t fit. I let Marie finish mine because I’m such a kind a generous person. We hung out with Marie’s flatmate who is an awesome Jazz singer (Marie writes, directs, produces and acts in movies – Google trampo films) so their flat was an awesome Parisian cliché. I missed out on seeing her flatmate perform by a day which was disappointing, but keep an eye out for her, I’ll post a link. She’s just finished a tour.

From there it was onto Berlin in Germany to visit an old friend Niko. He met me at the train station and we walked back to his apartment, which was amazing. Top of the apartment, spacious, awesome house.  In Germany (and in Paris too, I found), apparently landlords don’t care what you do. Niko had covered his walls in red and grey stripes, put up a hammock, paintings, photos, everything. It was such a cool flat. But you can’t see it so you probably don’t care. Just take my word for it.

We met his gf Tulli, who was Finnish, (Niko is German) so we all spoke in English, which I totally won at. Yussss. We went out for Turkish, which is a staple in Berlin, and came back to his place to watch Keinohrhasen, a German movie I had watched 4 years ago. He remembered that I’d watched it and hadn’t understood all of it due to lack of subtitles, so got it for us to watch. What a sweetheart.

The next day Niko had to go and cycle 120kms (as you do) so I wandered around the area, searching for markets and good coffee. I spent a couple of hours looking for markets that weren’t on, had a terrible coffee then an amazing one, plus it was up and down a lovely canal, so I wasn’t too worried.

Berlin finished his cycling, showered and was good to go, which is crazy to me. I would have lain down and died after riding 120kms, but he just walked a little funny then was fine.

We walked for 5 hours, to Berlin Gate, The Berlin Wall, Checkpoint Charlie and many tourist shops with terrible postcards. We had currywurst, I ate Pretzels, and life was good.  Berlin was cool; they have bits of the Berlin wall throughout the city and heaps to look at. I was only there a day so will definitely do all I can to go back this trip. We spent the evening at a local pub near his house catching up and being excited about our new relationships. Just like old times. Only there a day, so I left the next morning to Dresden on the bus, where I slept the whole way like a nana.

Stay tuned for Maike, more Germany, Prague and other exciting destinations.

London's calling...

I'm sitting in the basement of my German friend Maike's house in Welzeim, a little town South of Stuttgart.

I'm quite apprehensive about writing this as I've done SO MUCH since I started my trip, also because the Z and the Y are reversed, which means, inevitably, a lot of zous.

London was great, had such a great time being a tourist and citizen all in one.At the risk of writing a list of being one of those writers that lists everything I've done; instead I'll write out some highlights.

Some of the best stuff to do in London is 

A) drink a lot of goooood coffee, 

B) walk and enjoy all the sights and 

C) shop!

  Zac told me about an app that shared all of the places with really great coffee and it was right every time. Sometimes the coffees were okay, but usually they were amazing. Erin and Thomas live in an amazing area in the centre of the city where you can walk anywhere easily, or hop on a train and go everywhere else. MY favourite thing to do was to walk around areas trying different coffees and enjoying the sights and shops in between. There is so much stuff that you just can't get in OZ or NZ, including a lot of cool independent designers from tiny shops, or, in the case of Shoreditch- in a little box city made up of freight containers built up into a box of shops.  Apparently these guys tried to sue Christchurch when they did the same- even knowing that Chch were doing it because they didn't have shops anymore. Pricks. The markets in Camden were amazing, as were the Spitfields and pretty much everything else.

Sightseeing was great, even if you get lost you still have a great time because there are always museums, statues, art, shops and parks to wander past. There was one glorious day of Sunshine, were I walked around all of the parks and avoided Buckingham Palace wehich was surrounded by the crowds that were as excited as I was by the weather.  Such wonderful parks. Hyde Park was great- some Princess of something (can't keep up) got someone to made a lake in the middle which now has paddle boats. Good story. I lay in the sun and walked all day. Beautiful.

Went to see Singing in the rain which was pretty good- they used real rain and during some of the dances they had choreographed the dance to splash the audience in front, it was a good show. Going to see Wicked again and prob Jersey boys as everyone I know that's seen it won't stop talking about how great it is. Also went to a piano bar where we gathered around the table and sang for ages, making requests and generally being made fun of because we were NZers.  Erin got her dance on and kept being hit on by drunk girls; a good night.

I also did a Jack the Ripper tour which I wasn't so sure about, but it has been recommended so went along with Erin and Thomas, a short walk from their house to the site of the murders.  We had a beer in the pub where the murder victims were last seen, saw real photos from the time,, walked to to the houses and squares where the ladies were murdered, saw were clues were left, everything- it was like a murder mystery night.  The guy who ran it was clearly a huge fan and said he's been interested in Jack the Ripper since he was 12- i'd say about 40 years so knew all of the conspiracy theories and had his own ideas. So interesting_ it's strange how fascinating I found it all; i expected to be quite scared but it was more a little creepy, especially as all of the houses are still much the same, one street was all brick walls and old streetlamps.  Also, he showed us Diagon Alley and I exclaimed that I love Harry Potter a little too loudly when he asked. I also saw platform 9 3/4's and plan to walk around all of the spots where the movies were filmed on my return to London in a couple months.

It was bloody cold, though and rained a lot.  I still walked a lot, trying to dash in and out between showers but had a couple of grumpy days where i felt sorry for myself because it was raining. Funny thing is; most people tell me that London isn't cold and rainy all of the time like people think.  When I was there it was the wettest April in 100 years and coldest start to May in 70 years. Dumb.

Erin, Thomas and I took a weekend trip to Brighton in their campervan which was great fun. Despite the cold (6 degrees much of the time)  we had a great time and i got some super hot dresses. We walked along the pier and found this arcade where you used 2p coins to try and push other coins along at tray and down the chute.  Waste of money but with 1 pound worth, you felt super rich. It was super fun and so addictive, though 'Catherine Classic' came along.  I ran around finding money on the floor and became super competitive.  We did the same thing in Eastbourne (sp?) on the pier, except this time just used money we found.  It was such a fun game but sounds totally lame written down. E and T will back me up. Best. Holiday. Ever. Really. We slept by a gate in the middle of the countryside, enjoyed a local pub and Jamie's Italian, again. Seriously, that place is pucker. I love Jamie Oliver. On the way back we went to Battle, where the Battle of Hastings was fought- the town was so cute and used for Pilgrims for years.  My favourite was that everything was named with the place name, so Battle Abbey was common, Abbey being the last name of one of my best friends, Sarah, who has a kid that stands up for herself. BATTLE ABBEY.


Went along to see Phillip Yancey speak at Holy Trinity Brampton, which made the Christian nerd in me jump around a little.  I've been involved in a Christian course called the Alpha course for a while and this was the church were it started.  It's basically a run down of christian beliefs with free food and a discussion afterwards.  Anyone can come along and you're invited to share your opinion, even if your opinion is that it's a load of crap. I love the discussions and that it's a sort of bullshit free course on Christianity- no pressure, just chilled. Anyway, I saw the guy who is the face of Alpha, Nicky Gumbel, as well as this author, Phillip Yancey, who has written some pretty good books. He wrote one called 'what's so amazing about grace?' which was a great read about what grace really looks like.  Anyway, I was excited and Erin laughed at me.  A great church, though, I'd go there If I lived in the UK i think.


Saw some real life Chavs, heard the real voice of a scouser and laughed at the dickhead's who are real life versions of the people in this song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_5uVdy5YmA Loved the graffiti through Shoreditch, the blooming tulips, lovely food and the dinosaur exhibits.

I also did a lot of relaxing, read some great books (I LOVE THE HUNGER GAMES) and had some great time with Erin and Thomas. It was so great to hang out without the pressure of me leaving in a few days. I'm heading Back to London end of June so look forward to some more time then. I wonder how it'll be going back to OZ now that i'm used to so much contact with her. I worked at a little place called 'Look Mum, No Hands!' which was fun, a good team, learning on naked handles which was new for me, plus cash in hand.  The boss said he should be able to give me some work during the tour de France as well, in May. It's a bike themed cafe were they sell and repair bikes as well, like, bicycle bikes. Awesome vibe. Yew.


Could live in London I think, except the cold but I would just buy super hot coats anyway. An amazing place with so much to see and do, plus now I can steal Erin's friends as well as the ones I know there. Reckon I'll move there one day.  The coffee scene is so good, especially being a NZer who was trained in Australia- places actually advertise on their signs that they have Australian trained baristas, so i'm already in. Yus.

Since then I've been to Paris, Berlin and through Eastern Germany (well, a little)....to be continued.