German adventure

In Dresden I met Maike at the Train station as her bus had arrived only minutes earlier, coming from Annaberg. Maike has an old friend there who she goes and stays with often. He’s one of those chilled people who leaves a password for his friends and they can come and go from his house as they please, so he was happy for us both to stay there. His name was Marcus, such a fascinating guy.  He’s a real life inventor; (actually) he built his kitchen and bathroom himself. He roasts his own coffee that his sister sends him from Ethiopia, where she lives (usually Harrarr…mmm), just a great guy to get to know.  Maike and I bought Sauerkraut and bratwurst (at my request) and we had a traditional dinner with mashed potatoes.  There was loads of Sauerkraut left over and Maike tricked me into eating it for breakfast with bread and cheese, saying it was a typical German thing to do. It wasn’t so bad, but breakfast is a bit early in the day for it, I think. We ate loads of Milka and I was got excited over Markus’ little coffee grinder and his roasting techniques with coffee.

The next day Maike and I visited the little alleyways throughout Dresden, seeing the little shops and I learned about how felt is trendy there. They have shops dedicated to things made out of coloured felt, literally selling nothing but felt stuff. I gave in a bought a bright green felt ring, which I really liked. Not so much into the bright felt arm wraps they had. Hippies.   We did a tour of the old city, where Maike kept telling me lies about everything we saw and then I’d comment on it to the guide who would tell me I was wrong while Maike laughed. Maike actually knew just as much as the guide did, so next time I’m going to make her do the tour. Though she’ll probably lie. And I’ll definitely fall for it. Dresden has some cool history though. This guy August wanted to be the King of Poland, but didn’t have much money so he borrowed heaps and was all ‘here I am!” and it worked. He has a gold plated statue of himself and is so in love with himself. I’ve found my new goal in life. Anyone want to lend me some money?

That evening, Marcus, Maike and I went to see a play. It was a group from the Baltics who spoke in English. Four boys, four girls, sitting facing each other in chairs and sharing about real life experiences they had. Some were funny, some were really sad, others just made you think. Each story was told by the individual that owned that storey, then they pointed at other actors and gave them characters, for example, then my mother (points) said “you are a bad girl!”- then that actor will say that in their language (I can’t remember where they were from).  When it rained in the story, the actors drummed their fingers on their chairs. When there was music, the actors made the music. I’ve never seen anything like it, especially as the actors were using their real stories, but I really enjoyed it. After the play, we went to visit Marcus’ best friend in an old Dresden pub. I had the best cider I’ve ever had (better than NZ, I have to say) and we chatted for hours in this little local pub. Great fun.

The next day Uwe, (Maike’s boyfriend) Maike and I drove to Welzeim, where her parents live. On the way we stopped to put air in the tyres, when I heard a band playing music. I turned and saw men in random suits playing instruments badly, waving a giant flag.  I quickly got out of the cart to see them marching into the petrol station, with the flag bearer going in, still marching, asking for free beer and cigarettes. The band stopped playing then asked us for money.  Turns out it was Father’s Day in Germany and also Ascension Day, which, in this particular area meant that all of the men go out together, get really drunk and ride around in wagons covered in branches. These guys decided that they were part of a battalion that needed to be honoured with free things.  Maike and I laughed for a long time before they came over to ask for money. We chatted for a while and they learned I was from NZ.  One of the guys ran off and came back with a certificate that stated something along the lines of “I hereby honour and support this battalion, which is part of another fancy Battalion in Germany.   I offer…… in support of this noble cause and promise to do it again next year. Usually I think you get them for giving beer or money, but for me they wrote ‘a little kiss”.  I obliged and kissed one of them on the cheek, they all cheered, then I washed my mouth. It was so weird and hilarious. I love that Father’s day isn’t even spent with their kids. Bloody Germans.

Fun Fact: the German name for the Town Mayor is Burgermeister. I laughed for a very long time when I heard this.  Which makes the townspeople….wait for it….burgers. LOL

 Fun Fact #2: Germans really do drink all of the time.  They have hand bier, literally hand beer, which means a beer that you drink on your way to wherever you’re going. You see people walking around the streets at most times of day drinking beer, which only happens if you’re a hobo or a bogan in NZ.

After each meal (usually with beer or wine) it’s usual to have Schnapps.  At one point I had a sore stomach and Maike suggested that I have schnapps to help it.  I thought she was kidding, but they have herbal liquor that they use to settle the stomach. Or just drink because it’s yum. And it really is. Gave me a newfound appreciation for schnapps, though I still steer clear of the peach kind. Ha.

Staying with Maike’s family was great, I met them in NZ and stayed with them last time I was here. They are so lovely and hospitable and they don’t mind helping me out with my poor German. They taught me how to make homemade liquor

One evening, Uwe, Maike and I went to the Forrest Festival of lights. They had a whole lot of lanterns up and some tea light candles in coloured plastic sups on the grounds.  They had a brass band playing and had set up a beer garden with candyfloss, wurst and lots of beer.  I had my first hand bier on the way and learned a German song about Lanterns. The brass band was funny, they did beach boys’ compilations as well as traditional German songs that only the children and Maike and I danced to.  I got Candyfloss bigger than my face. Yum.

Maike’s Auntie and her partner stayed that weekend with us as well, I had the best one-liner conversation with her auntie; “Sorry my German is terrible, forgive me.” “No, it’s fine, I can understand you fine!” “Ah, but that’s because you are good at understanding”. It seems silly written down but I thought it was such a good response.

That evening we went to go and see a play.  Maike’s parents were great, they’d found a play where no-one speaks, so I could do and understand it okay. The play was so weird. They had made these giant creepy masks and just acted the whole time, with few sounds effects.  Here is the storyline. I’m not kidding.

Three men are in a bar. They are all sad and dreaming about what they wanted to do with their lives, but instead they have work and families that are annoying and controlling wives who make them forget their dreams. At the end, they get into a rocket ship and fly away. The end.

 It was so funny to see people’s reactions; most of the people there were middle-aged and were laughing hysterically. We sort of laughed a little but not too much.  Maike’s family came out and said how much they loved it, how funny it was, how true it was (not the rocket ship part) while Maike ranted about how crap it was. It was so funny.  Maike’s family paid for the tickets so I didn’t want to seem ungrateful but it was really quite a weird play.  The crowd gave about 6 ovations! Uwe and Maike work in the theatre so I guess their standards were higher but perhaps it’s an age thing. Probably that we’re just too intelligent though. That’s usually the case.

The next day Maike’s friend Madeleine came to visit from France.  Madeleine and I spent a little time together in NZ a few years ago so it was good to catch up. I met her Mexican boyfriend, Hector, and they all laughed at me when I pronounced the ‘H’. We all went for a lovely bicycle ride around the countryside.  Maike was worried because last time I visited I was so unfit and couldn’t ride very well. This time I totally won and followed her doing (tiny) wheelies to prove my point.  I got like 2 feet of air that time! The weather was perfect and afterwards we had icecream, so it was an awesome day.

We went home and Maike made me griess, which is semolina pudding sort of with custard. It’s pretty much my favourite thing ever and I really hope I can find the ingredients in Oz. It’s so cheap there and I want to cry with delight every time I eat it.

After a long weekend of amazing food (tried white asparagus, was so yum….Germans call it Aspbergers... Lol) we headed back to Annaberg.  It was in Annaberg that I played the greatest game of my life.  So, imagine this. You own 3 public toilets and charge Roman people to use them.  People pay more or less depending on their social status (slave, burger, (haha) women, senators, and they each use them for different lengths of time.  There are social rules where senators won’t wee next to a slave, for example and you have to follow these.  You form queues and strategically try to get heaps of people to use your toilet quickly and pay you loads. You get chance cards where people get food poisoning, swap around in queues, give your opponents people who do number twos….it’s brilliant. I got so competitive and quickly found that Maike was just as competitive as me.  I lost and disowned all allies.  Later on, Maike suggested that we watch the Cosby Show. I laughed unmtil I relaised they were serious…Uwe owned the whole season.  I gave it a go and it’s brilliant. What a great show- so clever, plus it’ll help me form a better Bill Cosby impression.

Fun fact #3  In Germany, Pepperoni is a type of cheese. Whaaaaat?

I had such a fun time catching up with Maike again and loved thatr we still get on so well despite not seeing each other in a long time. Maike’s friend said that this was because we’re both equally mean to each other. I’ll take that.